Three-word phrases for simple communication
Sarah Long arrived in Australia from the UK in early 2010 and met her Mr Miner soon after. They're based in Sydney and he does drive-in, drive-out (DIDO) to Orange in country NSW. Sarah came out to Oz as part of a six-month backpacking trip around the world, and never went home!
I've said it before and I'll say it again: Mr Miner is not a great communicator.
He’s great with his hands and can fix anything I break (earrings, vacuum cleaner, furniture, you name it!), he’s got a great mind for problem solving and he’s way better than me at maths. But words are not his strong point.
I would say that the majority of our arguments are due to miscommunication (or even a complete lack of communication). Being raised on a farm with three brothers might have something to do with his lack of understanding when it comes to the subject of "talking to girls", but I think it’s also to do with the practical (and fairly simple) way his mind works. And I would dare to venture that this could be the same for many a mining man out there.
Now, I’m not suggesting that these otherwise lovely men of ours start spouting Byron or Shakespeare ("shake what?"’ I hear him say). But on occasion it would just be nice to hear what you need to hear - a simple little affirmation of something that you already know, but means so much more when uttered by the one you love.
For instance, last week I was working late so instead of putting away the clean washing like normal, I just dumped it in the spare room. Well, you should have heard the bashing, slamming and 'I can’t find any clean undies' grumbling! If, sometime in the previous two years, he'd actually thanked me for always putting his washing away - I might have been more sympathetic and helped him out when he was desperately seeking his jocks.
So for all you guys out there, he's a little list of handy three-word phrases what will improve your life out of sight, if you just speak plainly from time to time:
- Thank you darling: (or sweetheart or love or pet name). When you come home and the house is clean, the dinner’s cooked, or the washing is done and your undies are exactly where you expect to find them, that’s not magic or fairies, that’s us. Please say thank you.
- You look amazing: (or lovely, or pretty ... even nice will do!) You know when her hair looks different or she’s spent some time getting ready to go out and you can’t quite put you’re finger on it, but it’s pleasing to you? That’s when you need to speak up. It's particularly important to remember if her hair has been brushed and make up has been applied!
- You’re so hot: (or sexy or gorgeous). Please note, this is not to be used to get her into bed, although if used very well you might get lucky! Make it known that she’s the one who still gets your blood boiling (throw in a kiss for luck too).
- This is delicious: It might not be Cordon Bleu cookery, in fact it might just be a sandwich. But if time and love have gone into preparing that meal, then please be grateful. And no, burping loudly afterwards does not count!
- How was work: (or the kids or your day). OK, I’m getting past the three-word limit with this one, but it can go a long way. Particularly if she sounds stressed or tired. You don’t have to solve all her problems. Just listen and nod along as she vents - it will earn you several brownie points. For further instructions, the follow up to this is ‘Are you ok?’
- I miss you: If you think it, say it. There’s nothing wrong with missing someone and it will make her feel better about missing you too. Follow it up with an ‘I can’t wait to see you.’
- I love you: Use it wisely, sparingly and appropriately and it will mean more than anything.
And if all else fails, you can always revert back to last resort and Mr Miner's favourite: 'I am sorry!'
More from Sarah:
- The guilty pleasures of a woman left alone
- Help - I've started to nag my miner about marriage
- Goodbye is always the hardest word
- Don't be lonely when your miner's away. Enjoy precious 'me time' instead
- How to handle food intolerances when you work FIFO
- Lost that loving feeling? Go back to where it all began
- The great escape: holidaying out of a relationship rut
- Time for a DIDO relationship spring clean
- Reliable, flexible, super-organised ... 10 reasons why mining wives/partners ROCK
- How to make friends and really irritate them
- Relationship rules for DIDO DINKS
- Curse of a DIDO girlfriend: the fear of missing out
- After two years, a DIDO relationship is still love on steroids
- Body clocks and DIDO rosters: a rather stressful combination
- How anxiety counselling changed my life and prepared me for Mr Miner
- Making new friends - an essential tool in mining life
- Here's why I don't talk to Mr Miner while he's away at the mine site
- Sex confessions of a DIDO miner's girlfriend
- Roses are red and DIDO rosters make me blue
- Mixed emotions and my first mining Christmas
- All you need is trust
- How to make your own Prince Charming
- The guilty pleasure of 'man moaning' about my Mr Miner
- Down days and risotto
- How I met my miner
- Making your own life in a mining town
- So what's Orange really like?
If you've got a question for Sarah or would like to tell your own tale about mining life, we'd love to hear from you. Click here!