Hi, it's Lainie Anderson here. When I'm not working with Alicia on Mining Family Matters, I'm a journalist and commentator in Adelaide. For the past few years I've been writing a weekly column in South Australia's Sunday Mail newspaper, tackling all sorts of issues, from politics to wayward sporting stars. Often I also write about family life, motherhood and marriage, and I thought these columns might touch a chord with MiningFM readers. 

Years ago in my single backpacking days, the idea of an all-inclusive family resort would have made my stomach turn quicker than a good dose of Bali belly.

Nowadays I’m not nearly so snobby – and I actually have a theory that mums are the big winners when families head off for cheesy sun-filled holidays beside kid-crammed swimming pools.

Here’s why...

Since our earliest days of parenthood, my husband has lamented that we rarely get time alone together.

My reply (more often than not in my head) is that I don’t get time alone, full stop!

After working a full day at the computer and getting the kids bathed and fed, the last thing I feel like doing is staring adoringly into my dear beloved’s eyes. Mostly I just want to collapse into bed and surf the channels for the least trashy reality TV program I can find.

Don’t get me wrong, I adore my husband. But, if the kids are both out of the picture for a drop-and-run birthday party (don’t you love it when your kids reach that age!) I don’t want to chat to anyone besides the shop assistants in my nearest Esprit store.

Selfish? Undeniably. But the only time I really get to myself these days is skulking in the car at school pickup. I miss it.

This year, though, I had a little ‘me-time’ epiphany, and it happened during a short break to Vanuatu.

No cooking. No cleaning. No dishes. No Olympic-type drills to get the kids from bed to school in the morning. (That’s not necessarily the case on holiday, is it? Sometimes you go away with children and it feels like you simply move the madness – the cooking, cleaning and dishes come with you, while the toys that usually keep them distracted get to rest at home.)

This Anderson adventure (Jack and Harry hate it when I say that!) was different. And it came down to a perfect combination of action-packed family activities and the heavenly quiet of children away at kids’ club.

Here’s how our days panned out:

Morning – lazy lie-in before big buffet breakfast, then crazy fun stuff like walking through cascading waterfalls, snorkelling down to the world’s only underwater post office and hooning through the streets of Port Vila in dune-buggies.  

Afternoon – boys race off to see their mates in kids’ club, grown-ups spend an hour or so taking a nap, playing Scrabble or snorkelling out in the lagoon. Boys return at 4pm to play games in the pool with dad while I get ME TIME.

Evening – huge dinner with boys before they scoot back to kids’ club for disco or movies, while we have a drink at the bar before collecting the boys and bed.

Divine.

We’ve been lucky enough to enjoy two short resort-based family holidays in the Pacific, and I have to say that staying near Port Vila in Vanuatu was more fun for us than the Coral Coast in Fiji (both of which you’ll find are heavily promoted via budget holiday websites).

The Coral Coast, right down around the bottom of Fiji’s main island of Viti Levu, is great if the kids are really little and require daily naps, and you don’t intend to venture past the frangipani walls of your resort. We stayed at the Warwick Fiji Resort and Spa, which was gorgeous (and the kids’ club ladies wonderful) but in truth a bit far from anywhere. And less to do means more required of you!

The Warwick Le Lagon Resort and Spa in Vanuatu was different. It’s set on its own quiet lagoon just a couple of kilometres from the 'capital' of Port Vila, on the main island of Efate. You can walk to the main markets, museum, shops and restaurants (or pay a few bucks for a taxi). And major attractions like the Ekasup Cultural Village – where warriors freak you out from behind the palms and the kids will learn more in an hour than a week at school – are just a short bus ride away.

So ladies, here’s what I’m saying: don’t be afraid of crowded family-friendly resorts where kids seem to run wild. You’ll be surprised what noise you can drown out when you’re lying in the sun on the sanctuary of your day bed, with a good book in one hand and a G&T in the other.

PS: Shop around after you find a good deal online. Our local Flight Centre office was happy to beat the cheapest price quoted, by matching the deal and giving us vouchers to spend on our next holiday or flights.

More Playing Mum columns:

• Meet the Adelaide mums who take ICE to get the cleaning done
• No, it's NOT ok to change your baby in the middle of the restaurant
• After the UK riots, let's devote more time to parenting
• Don't wait for a funeral to express how you feel
• So, what did I learn in the first five years of motherhood?
• Want to live longer fellas? Try these super foods
• Marathon mum? Yes you can!
• Give me Neil Diamond's Beautiful Noise over Rihanna's racket any day
• Parents running out of excuses over kids' obesity levels
• Old hand's guide to surviving toddler birthday parties
• Why Ben 10 was banished from the Anderson household
• Motherhood through the ages - so much has changed!
• Is your child oppositional and demanding? Might be food additives!
• Forget diamonds - a shed is a girl's best friend
• It's my turn - hand over the Wii controller
• Screaming is the new smacking
• Nightmare at Dreamworld
• Forget nagging your husband: try EQ!
• Romance (that thing at the bottom of the priorities list)
• Why my husband's such a caveman when it comes to parenting

If you'd like to share some great stories on marriage and playing mum, let us know. We'd love to hear from you.